July 14, 2010

Some Days You Are Brave

I have always planned (well, since I knew she had Down syndrome) to speak out for Rachel. I have no shame in her having Down syndrome. I don't care if everyone knows she has it. I don't hide it. But, I've never said to a room of people, out loud, that my daughter has Down syndrome. Today at a Baby and Me yoga class we all sat around and had to introduce ourselves and our babies. As other people talked, I debated in my mind whether to even say anything. If I don't say it, will it seem like I'm ashamed of her? If I do say it, will that be all they see in her from now on? Person by person it got closer to my turn and I knew I had to decide. I decided to say, "Hi, I'm Maggie and this is Rachel. She was born 10 weeks early and we found out four days before that she has Down syndrome."  Wow, that felt good. I think that if people know she has Ds and they see who she is and what she can do maybe if they give birth to a child with Ds they will think of her and go, "Oh, this isn't going to be bad at all. I remember that girl from Yoga. She was cute and acted like any other baby." I want to save them at least some of the pain that I felt at hearing those words at the hospital. I didn't know anything about Ds. I never saw any babies with it before so I reacted the way I thought I should at hearing my daughter wasn't "perfect", I cried my eyes out and yelled at God. I think if I had been around another baby with Ds before she was born, I probably wouldn't have reacted as badly as I did. I'm only glad that I moved on from that grief stage quickly because it would have interfered with me being able to see the beautiful, goofy and strong willed girl I gave birth to.

6 comments:

  1. Yay for you! I know I would have been the same way, not sure what to say but I'm glad you decided to tell it like it is and be proud of i! She's precious and she's doing sooo good sitting up like a big girl!!!

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  2. I have that debate with myself all the time. Sometimes I'm simply not in the mood. But other times, especially when people oo and ah over her so much, I just want to say "do you know she has Ds?". I really like the idea of changing perceptions, and getting out there that it's not the end of the world. Like you said, you never know who will have some connection in the future! :)

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  3. Awesome! Mom & baby yoga sounds great too! When you go back the next week I bet it will be all the easier!

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  4. I think DS or not, she is one of the most precious babies I have ever seen. Ranked up there with mine! LOL

    I don't know how I would have reacted to hearing the news you did, but I think I would have cried and probably yelled at God too! I don't know how I would introduce my baby(ies) either. But I commend your strength and all your hard work to make Rachel grow up to be whatever it is she decides to do. And I am sure she will aim high!

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  5. Maggie you are amazing! Rachel sure is blessed!

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  6. This is Kelly, Korey Hickling's sister... Korey recommended that I read your blog, and I'm so glad I did! Rachel is such a beautiful baby and your story is so inspiring. I'm so glad you and Korey have each other! I love these pictures of Rachel on your latest post and what you said at the yoga class. Rachel is sooooooo cute!

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